I started writing a post that just did not matter…and so I stopped and wrote this prayer…I hope it helps you.

 

Dear God, please do not confuse our myopic minds any longer, and God allow our pedantic hearts to blush before your throne! -amen

 

-May you realize just how close He really is… -Ericki  

 

P.S. On a WAY different note…I want to declare to you that my rash is gone…yippee.

It might make you say, “O”

 

That December night I walked down the old dirt road as I gazed up at the moon and stars and this thought occurred to me … The universe…ahh yes the universe is hosted up on a long and firm oak that is pulsating.  The sounds are as if a young calf fighting for her first moments of life…The calf teams with life and longs for more she longs to break out and burst the seams of her known world…for there is more out there than this, she ponders…she paces up and down in the midst of the muggy morning…as the dew drips slowly from the cud that she has just consumed…it is as if honey is flowing from her mouth….She starts to wonder is this all there is in life? But in a moment I remembered the geysers of Yellowstone…for how quickly have I abandoned the notion that the universe is grand and glorious…for it is. 

Remember: in an unexpected flash of a moment the universe will be stifled to her knees as she pants for air…fore, the oak is now aged and weathered and comes tumbling down losing all the vestige of life…and the universe falls off… —-The universe is coming to an end, people… don’t forget it… it will come in a flash.  People get ready Jesus is coming…it will surprise you when He arrives…it just…might make you say, “O”

 

And then i went home that December evening.  And said, ‘Lesson learned… a penny saved is a penny earned’…… as I lit a cigar and smelled the daylight coming.  

 

-Welp, lets go home…folks …–Eric

I officially have a rash that started on my high inner thigh… it is teaming with life and growing by the minute… “me infwaygo” (sounded that spanish word…for fire out–haaa)… it brings new definition to the word, “intense”…

It feels like i have an STD…Thus i will use the words of former commander and chief, Billy Willy Clinton when he says, “I did not have sexual relations with that woman, Ms. Luinskie.”  And again…let me reassure you that i do not have an STD…ive touched noone…nada.  Unless i picked it up from a toilet seat or something lame like that… and if that is the case…then WELL that would royally suck…like the KC Royals (weeping)…  Have no fear…for my Gynocologist mother is here… she is a nurse at Freemans OBGYN… so she got me some products to help it go away… i am thankful for my moms free samples… Oh did i mention that they are “women” products… but they work just the same… hahahahaha… no worries here folks!!!  I am determined (woman haha…no jk) to see the “rash” to the door…and to say, “that your not welcome any more…now go”…Anyway my battle cry is, “Depart oh rash of mine…depart……flee…and flee with haste!!!”

Ok, ok…i’ve probably said to much… but if you see me limping around or walking like ive been on a bull named Foo-Man-Chew…then just dismiss it…and say, “Oh thats just Eric… he just has a rash teaming in his shorts and it must be flaring up… thats all…its just Eric’s ‘STDs’ acting up again…”…hahahaha 

-Staggering around with a flowered unbrella & using it as a cane… -Eric